Ollie And The Secret Service Agents

Before the old man could enter, they frisked him, looking for weapons and contra-band and also, he passed through a metal detector, however, the metal detector let out an alarm and they stopped him from going any farther, although just outside the detector, Ollie quickly picked up his trusty cane to steady himself.

“I’m sorry sir, but you’ve got something metallic on your body and we must confiscate it,” said the lone secret service agent tasked with the search.

Ollie thought about it, and then realized that he had a small silver chain around his neck, under his shirt collar, which had a crucifix hanging on the bottom, with a silver body of Jesus on the cross. He always wore it, no matter where he went, ever since that first time, that he nearly died and learned the truth from the light.

“I’m sorry sir, but you’ll have to take off that crucifix necklace.  We won’t allow anything metal near the president.”

“I can’t do that sir,” said Ollie

“Yes, you will do it.  The President has requested your services today, and has made special arrangements from his busy schedule to see you.”  The burly agent folded his arms and presented himself as intransigent as he could to the white-haired old man with a cane.

“I never take off my cross.  It belongs on my body at all times and so, it is a part of me wherever I go.  I can’t see how you feel that is a threat to the president’s security, young man.”

“These are rules for the Oval Office and they will not be broken.  So, I suggest that you hand over the cross and necklace.  We will give it back to you, after you have your meeting with the president.  No problem.”

“It will not happen.  You can make an exception for me, I am sure. I’m just a harmless old man who is stubborn in his ways.  I am no threat to the president.  But I wonder, is it the metal that bothers you, or the fact that it represents the crucifixion of Jesus Christ?”

“No exceptions.”

“Ok then. I suggest you contact your superiors and make a decision now.  Or better yet, ask POTUS how badly he wants to see me this time.  After all, he should be able to take care of this since his office sent me an invitation, again.”

With that, a second secret service agent joined his colleague —one directly in front of Ollie and the other a few feet off to his left. Ollie could see that their sport coats were open wider now, obviously for easier access to cross fire with their weapons.

“Sir, please be reasonable. We will not bother the president for such a trivial matter.  However, we can call the chief of staff.”  The agent stepped away and called someone on his radio, then walked back, shaking his head.

“I know you guys are just doing your job, and I respect that, but I suggest you do something to resolve this matter young man, or this will not be a good day for you or the Oval Office.” The lead agent smirked after that comment by Ollie, then turned his head to look at his colleague to Ollie’s left, but made the mistake of quickly reaching his arm out to grab Ollie’s chain necklace.  Ollie’s reflexes caught the young man’s arm one inch before it reached his neck and he pivoted and twisted the agent’s arm while he simultaneously bent over and flipped the agent over his back, directly into the other agent, and they both landed on the floor, on their backs, dazed and surprised by the lighting reflexes of the old man.

Within seconds, Ollie was surrounded by five Secret Service agents, weapons drawn, pointed directly at him, and they were on their tactical radios, calling for back-up.  The two agents the old man threw down now had crimson faces, and were dusting themselves off, embarrassed that an old man took them down for their colleagues to see. They put Ollie In handcuffs and took him away, out of the White House.

“I need my cane,” said Ollie.

“No, you apparently don’t need it, said the lead agent.  We will impound it and you can pick it up some day, if you ever get out of jail. You’ll probably use it as a weapon. You are under arrest under the following U.S code:  18 USC &111:  It is a felony to forcibly assault, resist, oppose, impede, intimidate or interfere with federal law enforcement officers, including Secret Service agents, in the performance of their duties.”

Ollie limped along now, without his cane, always favoring his left leg, in handcuffs, surrounded by five highly trained White House Secret Service agents, on their way to the Washington DC jail.

“I told you guys to make an exception for me and it seems the someone didn’t think it was necessary.”

“You made a bad mistake in the White House, old man, said the lead agent. Now you’re going to have a lot of alone time in jail to think about what you’ve done.”

Ollie smiled and said, “I’ve been in lots of places worse than the DC jail, and you guys need to know, there is a metal cross, with Jesus on it, tacked under the wood out-cropping of the president’s large desk.  Looks very much like the one you guys wanted to take from me.”

The secret agents looked at each other-incredulous that this would be possible.  “That would be impossible, old man.”

Ollie said, “No, I tacked it there, when the president wasn’t looking, six months ago during our first meeting, right before he tripped and I caught him, keeping him from hitting the floor.  Kind of a powerful calling card, you might say.  Go ahead, search his desk, but I don’t think the president will be very happy right now.  Fact is, I’m not very happy right now either, with the not-so-welcome reception I received at the White House.”

©2024 SRCarson Publications.

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About main

S.R. Carson is a physician specialist and a published fiction and non - fiction author. He appreciates the gift of life and writes about it on his blog which includes a variety of posts including humor, satire, inspiration, life stories and spirituality.

2 thoughts on “Ollie And The Secret Service Agents

  1. Well Mr. Carson, you just keep knocking that baseball right out of the ball park. I love this new twist in the “Ollie Saga”. Ollie is a refreshing force not to be reckoned with. And I loved how he outsmarted security in his last visit to the Oval Office. Very clever indeed. I’m glad Ollie didn’t cave to mere mortals and stood up for the Divine King of Kings. We should all be brave like Ollie. Stellar writing! Thanks for the grand slam homerun!

  2. oh what a turn. I’m delighted.. but will he really be sent to prison? no, I don’t believe it.. more likely there will be agents there who didn’t see to it that he attached the cross to the table!! 100 percent!

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