It used to be that I always thought the best about people, even though they may not have earned this treatment from me.  In fact, it was common for me (and still is), for me to give people second chances.  However, as time goes on and the gray invades my side burns and winter goatee, I have become less tolerant of people who in the past, have taken advantage of my kindness.  In fact, if a person does not demonstrate at least a little integrity, or reliability and honesty in their dealings with me, then, I will have nothing to do with them. I will kick them to the side of the road and not worry about them at all or more importantly, not allow them to get close to me.  My senses are more attuned to the characteristics of these people now, and it may be behaviors they demonstrate, or just words. That is why I only surround myself with good people and it is better to have one reliable friend, than ten unreliable acquaintances.

Here are some examples:

“I will call you tonight or tomorrow.”

And of course, they do not call me tonight, tomorrow, or any time at all for a year.  They no longer have access to me.

Reminds me of the Eagles song: New Kid in Town: They will never forget you until someone new comes around.

“How are you?“

After they say this, they do not wait for the answer I provide, and keep walking, fearing I may say the truth, and make them provide a response that may require some thought.  The usual response is “good” or “doing well”, even if things are going poorly at the time and my dog has just died, for example.  Or, sometimes I will say “perfect”.   I know they simply do not want to know the brutal truth, nor do I care that they know. Do they really want to hear about my dead dog, or that my knee is killing me so much that I can barely walk?  No, not usually.  People are usually interested in themselves and their life only and do not want to be bothered by you, so why fake it?

I think it’s best not to say “How are you” but instead, “Good to see you, have a nice day.”  It is not a question that requires a thoughtful response.  Or sometimes. I will say, “Hi Bill, have a good one.”

However, if someone walks by you and says “How are you” then doesn’t wait a few seconds for the response but keeps walking, they will no longer have access to me or at least not in my circle. You know, the Carson Circle of trust, like crazy De Niro in Meet The Fockers.

I am here for you.

Ok.  That’s nice.  But they are not there for you when it is inconvenient for them, or doesn’t provide them something in return.  No integrity means no soul.  Access to me denied.

Our thoughts and prayers are with you:

This is a tough one, and I must tread lightly, since it is a sensitive subject. Those words are meant to be soothing and comforting.  However, when on TV, a personality says these words, in order to comfort those in a tragedy, it has become too common and borders on fakeness.  Sorry, it does.  Words often fall short of consoling a victim of a tragedy.  But I must ask, did they actually pray for the family?  Did they actually get down on their knees and pray to God almighty, or did they just say it because it sounds empathetic and gets good ratings?  My rule of thumb, is I won’t tell anyone I pray for them at all, until I actually get down on my knees or sit down and pray the words silently to God.  In fact, I think if you say you are going to pray for someone, you should either do it right there with them, or do it a few minutes later, when they walk away.  But if you say it, do it.

However, there is a new breed it seems, that has become more common for whatever reason.  These are the Smiling Bobble Heads:

Most commonly, you find them on TV, usually opinion commentators or guest commentators talking about politics, or issues of the day, whether it be the unproven mantra of Global warming, Critical Race theory indoctrination, Illegal aliens or whatever topic is common.  It can also be someone giving what they think is an instructional lecture because you know, they are perceiving themselves as and expert or something. So, when on camera, she, or he, or it, starts spewing out their opinion quickly, non-stop all the while smiling at the camera while shaking their heads up and down constantly, as if they were asked a yes/no question by an imaginary person, continuously, and they can’t stop nodding yes. Clearly, they disagree vehemently with the other person on set, but instead of disagreeing and being serious about it, they smile with the brightness of a shimmering lake in the sun, while under their breath they are saying, you are stupid fool, and I hate you for disagreeing with my narrative and I do not want to listen to what you say, but my smile makes it all ok and shows I am a superior human.  In fact, if I could, I would rip your ugly lips off if you do not agree with me.  And of course, they keep bobbing or nodding their head up and down, while blabbing and smiling, as if they are re-affirming that all must agree with them, and no other opinion should be considered by reasonable people.  I respect only people who, if they disagree with you, they look you in the eyes, say they disagree, then, provide a respectful and cogent reason why.  No need for fake smiles and bobble heads.

 Always walk away from a smiling bobble head and do something more educational and productive, like trimming your curly nose hairs.  If that is not practical, then switch to sports if you must watch TV, although that is not always safe from smiling bobble heads, and it is just best to turn off the damn mindless TV and read a good book, and form your own opinion about life, with thoughtful non-bobble headed, unsmiling reflection.

Then, after that, go get a cold beer out of the refrigerator, and smile, knowing you have not polluted your mind with garbage.  Who knows, you might even get to make love with your lady, who appreciates that you are not staring at the TV, and of course, if that happens, that book will end up on the floor, and who cares if you lost your place.

©SRCarson 2022